Wednesday, February 4, 2009

For Grandma

Thank you all for your words of support last week. My sadness was caused by waiting for the phone call that my Grandma Fox had died. I spent a couple of days with her in Atlanta the weekend before last, was able to say goodbye then, but having to leave my dad and brother to come home and wait in a daze for a week was more difficult than saying goodbye. I couldn't start to cry, I couldn't start to mourn, I could only wait.

Grandma lived a long, full, laughter filled life, one we can all learn from. She taught me how to tell a good story, make mashed potatoes, and to laugh, always laugh, even in the worst of moments. Hers was a life to celebrate, not to mourn. I miss her, but I grieve for my family, they are in such pain. The sorrow I feel is a result of not being able to say a magic word and take all of their hurt away. I know this will come in time, but for now, we all are left to make our own way out of the fog.

As we stood by her graveside, my Grandpa remarked the cemetery people must be related to parking lot people. Not a tree in sight. He was right. The only thing growing from the earth were the headstones and memorial benches. I thought of one of my favorite thinking spots back home, the old cemetery behind the library, with it's huge shading oaks and rolling hills. I may have to accidentally push a few acorns into the ground next time I visit Grandma. And a rose bush. Those were her favorite.

10 comments:

JoAnn said...

What a shame that cemetary didn't have any trees. Just doesn't seem right.

My condolences on the loss of your grandmother.
Mine have been gone for more than 20 yrs now, but I still think of them often, wear their aprons and use their recipes.
All grandmothers won't be forgotten.

Jami said...

I am sorry to hear about your grandmother also Heather. That has to be really hard. I wanted to let you know I had posted a bread recipe when I read this post. Maybe kneading the dough will be therapeutic. Take care!

kim said...

As time passes, it's amazing the little things you realize you do or have meaning because of them. I'm sorry for your loss.

magnusmog said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Good grandmothers are supremely precious.

the Lady said...

I'm sorry for your loss.

Mom said...

That is a beautiful post, Heather. Grandma would be proud and no doubt is smiling down from above at the lovely young woman you've become. We must do as the priest said, talk to her often!

Kellie said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss.

I'll make sure to push some acorns in the ground for you two.

Jen said...

Many sympathies. My thoughts are with you. Let the tears flow free and laughter prevail. Rejoice in her life and your shared time. The pain of missing is just the reiteration of love.

Left-Handed Housewife said...

I'm sorry about your grandmother, Heather, so sorry for your loss.

A cemetery should have trees, so the birds will have a place to sing.

frances

amandajean said...

i'm so sorry to hear of the loss of your grandmother.